Poetry Corner with Legato Bluesummers
by Lucky Meryl
Summary: My first humor fic! Yeah, I am a hopeless romantic in case you didn't already know. It is a show for the kiddies starring who else? Why Legato Bluesummers of course! Legato talks about his favorite poems and poets with the children. R&R Please!
1. Description

Poetry corner

A man sits in an old classic style chair in a well lit country room. Next to him is a fire place glowing bright, warming the room with its bright embers. On the wall near him is a large book case with countless books. On the other wall are pictures of strange looking men in weird costumes.

The man in the chair had shiny blue hair and a long white coat with a skull the left shoulder and spikes on the right. Truly creepy. "Hello boys and girls," The man started, his voice calm and emotionless, "and welcome to the poetry corner, with me, Legato Bluesummers."

Legato had a grin on his face, but not one of welcoming someone, but of pure evil. His grin broadened as he stood up. "Today we are going to be discussing how poetry describes us." He placed his hands together. "The poem that describes me best is a poem by Emily Dickinson. Have any of you ever heard of her?" He asked. No answer came back to him. "Oh okay. Well for those of you viewers who don't know, she was a poet who wrote beautiful pieces of art. She was born over a hundred years ago. Isn't that amazing?"

A scream from a fan girl is heard from the audience. "I love you Legato!!!"

"I know you do, but you are taken are you not Ms. Rain?"

The cameras zoom in on a black haired girl in blue jeans and a "Chevy" t-shirt with a Tennessee Volunteers hat on. "Uhh...." the boy next to her, whom looked maybe two years older than her stood up and growled at Legato.

He turned to Rain, "I'll deal with you later."

"Ooo, kinky." She replied. "But don't punish Legato for my outburst."

"You're right. You'll get your punishment later."

"Thank you Kiba!" The girl hugs him tightly.

"Anyways," Legato said, causing the cameras to turn back to him, "On with the show."

"Emily Dickinson wrote beautiful poetry. Many of her poems involving romance or great tragedy. The one that I think describes me is called 'I Like a Look of Agony'"

Rain could be heard cracking up laughing in the background.

"I shall read you the poem so that you can see if it describes me like I believe it does," Legato pulled a book off the shelf and opened it to a random page. "Ah, here it is."

'I like a look of agony,

Because I know it's true;

Men do not sham convulsion,

Nor simulate a throe.

The eyes glaze once, and that is death.

Impossible to feign

The beads upon the forehead

By homely anguish strung. '"

Rain once again cracks up laughing.

"Normally hosts of shows would kick an audience member that loud out, but considering that she is one of the only two people who actually came to watch the show I can't." Legato put the book away and sat back down on his red old English chair. "So what did you think?" Once again no reply came to him except for hysterical laughter from Rain. "That's nice."

"No one said anything you idiot!" Rain screamed.

Legato gritted his teeth, "Anyways, did you think it described me?"

"Uh DUH!" The same girl screamed. "Hey put me down!" The cameras turned back over to Rain. Kiba had thrown her over his shoulder and was carrying her up the stairs to the exit. "Where are we going?!"

"You need to suffer the consequences of your actions." He replied.

"Ooh....Bye!" She said enthusiastically, waving from over Kiba's shoulder."

"Now that we have the Tennessee loving girl-"

"Representin'!" Rain's voice was heard from the hall.

"Out of here," Legato said again, "We may get on with the show." Legato took a deep breath and laid his hands on his lap. "How about you children? Do you know of any poems that describe you? If not you should find one. Once you find that poem find a way to represent it. Like draw a picture of something that will remind you of that poem, or write it out and frame it and place it on your wall so you can look at it when you go in your room.

"Well children, that's all the time we have for today." Legato said. "I hope you come again. Have a hor- great day."

A loud voice spoke as the lights went dim in the set where Legato was sitting. "This episode of Poetry Corner with Legato Bluesummers was brought to you by Black Kitty Beer, remember, if you want to get intoxicated, the black cat is always there,

"Bernardelli Insurance Agency if you catch the stampede we'll pay you, but we aren't paying for the stuff you destroy.

"And by the Gung-ho Guns, don't hang around us, we're the reason the typhoon is in so much trouble."

"On the next episode of Poetry corner with Legato Bluesummers, great love poems, featuring Alone by Edgar Allan Poe." Legato said, the spotlight on him. "And maybe the people who review will come to the show this time. I hope to see someone else besides Rain. Goodbye boys and girls. See you tomorrow!"


	2. Love

Thanks:

Fear the Azuma- I'm glad you liked it!

Sephirothe1Ripley8- I am gonna use that in a different chappie and I am glad I mae you laugh

Kristen the Hornfreak- Don't Die!! You are in the Audience!!

Fudo Mizumaki- You are in the audience but if you e-mail me with a little profile about yourself I will give you a part in the story. I WANT MY COOKIE NOW!!

Manga Queen13- I am going to use that later on

Lady Zhen Ji- Do you hate me now?

Nick's Derringer Girl- oh and I am going to write a good bit on this story.

"Hello guys and gals." A blue haired man started, trying to sound joyful but to no avail. The lights brightened and a room of elegance and class was unveiled from darkness. "How are you all today?"

A faint "fine" was his response.

"That's great." Legato looked around at the audience and his grin broadened even more. "It seems as though we have more guests today. That's good." He strummed his fingers together as they were close to his mouth. "That's **_very_** good."

"Well kids, today we have a special guest on our show. He is a hurt mortal enemy in another story is my envious enemy. Come on in Vash the Stampede."

Corny welcoming music began to play as the blonde show gunman came through the "front" door of the "house".

"Hello everybody!" The donut loving typhoon waved at the audience and stopped in mid-wave. His eyes widened and he stepped forward slowly. "W-W-Wolfwood?!"

A dark-haired guy in the audience looked around wondering why the spotlight was suddenly on him. "Who? Me?"

"Yes! It's really you! Wolfwood!" Vash said, spreading his arms widely and running towards the stranger crying. Not long after the stranger was wrapped in the arms of a crying humanoid typhoon. "You're alive! You're really alive!"

"AaaAaaAA! I'm NOT HiM!!"

"Vash stopped spinning the person and looked at the now swirly eyed Wolfwood impersonator. "Your not…Wolfwood?"

"No! I'm Drew!"

"Drew? …AAH!! I hugged a stranger! Cooties!"

"Well you hug people all the time so why should you care now?"

"What? How did you know that?" Vash got really close to Drew's ear and whispered one simple question. "Are you a gun-ho gun?"

"No. I'm just a big fan of your show."

"I have a show?"

"Uh…Yeah!"

"Why didn't I know of this? I'm calling my lawyer!"

"You don't have a lawyer. But you do have two insurance girls. Oh and speaking of which. What the world needs now….is love sweet love!" Drew continued singing as Vash blushed and got even redder when he noticed that Meryl was in the audience.

"Shh! Shh!!!" He said nudging Drew in the ribs.

"Hehehe…"

Vash went back to the couch to hopefully take Meryl's mind off of Drew's song.

"Now Vash." Legato began. "Are you done interrupting my show?"

"Uh…hehe…yeah I guess so."

"Now, those of you who don't know, today's theme is love poetry."

"Yup!"

"Love poetry is perhaps the most beautiful type of poetry. The author sets up a romantic atmosphere with words and spills their silly little emotions onto paper in the form of a poem." Legato said. "Do you have a poem for us Vash?"

"Actually I do. As many of you know, song lyrics are a form of poetry. Well my poem is a part of the song entitled Hello by Lionel Richie.

"I've been alone with you inside my mind,

And in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times.

I sometimes see you pass outside my door

Hello, is it me your looking for?

Cause I can see it in your eyes,

I can see it in your smile

You're all I ever wanted

My arms are open wide

Cause you know just what to say

And you know just what to do

So let me start by saying,

I love you."

"That was disgusting….-ly beautiful. Thanks Vash."

"Thank you too Legato."

"Was there someone that inspired you to read that particular poem aloud Vash?"

Drew laughed hysterically in the audience until Legato glared at him evilly and Drew sunk down in his seat.

When Legato turned back around Vash was standing over him. "What are you doing?"

"Hm." Vash chuckled. "I'm taller than you!"

Legato laughed slightly. "At least I'm no Himura Kenshin."

The audience laughed while Vash, considering he had no drum set, said, "Budum chh!"

"Anyways," Legato began again, getting a bit annoyed. "Who inspired you?"

Vash started pressing his fingers together nervously while looking around the audience. "Well umm…"

"AWW!!" Everyone turned to look at the girl standing bow-legged in the doorway of the audience room. It was Rain. "He's talking about-"

"No! I want to say it! Besides, what are you walking like that?"

Rain giggled. "I tell you what, if punishment is a bad thing, then I must be Satan."

Legato went wide eyed.

"I don't get it!" Vash whined.

"You really don't want to." Legato replied.

"Budum chh?"

"No…just…no." Legato took a deep breath and looked back at Vash. "Now, once again, Vash, who was this song for?"

"Well uh umm…"

"Just say it already!"

"Meryl!" Vash's voice squeaked like a frat-boy as he confessed.

The short insurance girl blushed brightly as she stood up. "You do? You… you love me?"

"Uh…yeah?" He said, scared of getting hit.

"I…um…I love you too."

"Really?" Vash jumped up from his seat.

Meryl nodded. "I do."

"Yippee skippee!!" Vash ran across the room to the audience and threw Meryl over his shoulder. He then ran out of the room screaming "See ya!"

"Aww…" Legato watched the door. "How grotesque."

"I bet they went to eat sandwiches." Drew yelled.

Rain cracked up laughing and fell back our of her seat. "I am okayyy no I'm not."

"Well that's nice. Lets get on with the show once again. My poem is called Alone, by the great Edgar Allan Poe. Who has ever heard of Edgar Allan Poe?"

Hoots of happiness roared from the audience.

"Obviously people love Edgar Allan Poe. Now, this poem describes my love lif. Or lack there of.

"From childhood's hour I have not been  
As others were; I have not seen  
As others saw; I could not bring  
My passions from a common spring.  
From the same source I have not taken  
My sorrow; I could not awaken  
My heart to joy at the same tone;  
And all I loved, I loved alone.  
Then–in my childhood, in the dawn  
Of a most stormy life–was drawn  
From every depth of good and ill  
The mystery which binds me still:  
From the torrent, or the fountain,  
From the red cliff of the mountain,  
From the sun that round me rolled  
In its autumn tint of gold,  
From the lightning in the sky  
As it passed me flying by,  
From the thunder and the storm,  
And the cloud that took the form  
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)  
Of a demon in my view."

A small, slightly hesitant applause ended the poem.

"You see? This story describes the love of being alone as a demon erupts from the sky to join the person in his sanctuary."

A bell sounded signaling the end of the show.

"Well kids, I guess that's all for today."

"Aww!"

"I know, I know. But I **will** see you again next time. Good bye for now. On the next episode is themed beauty, see you then!" Legato tried to sound cheerful but it really didn't work, it just made him sound all the more creepy.

"This episode of Poetry corner with Legato Bluesummers was brought to you by…

"Black Kitty Beer- Remember, when ever you want to get intoxicated, the black kitty is always there.

"Bernardelli Insurance Society- We may not pay if you destroy your house in the process, but we will pay you if you catch Vash the Stampede.

"Gun-ho Guns- Come to kill, leave and be killed.

"Please come back next time to Poetry Corner with Legato Bluesummers."


	3. Beauty

"Good morning boys and girls, and welcome…to Poetry Corner with Legato Bluesummers. It seems the audience is growing. Good." Legato walked around his room towards his large antique-style chair. "Now, you may already know this but just in case, today's theme is-…"

Snoring cut him off, but he just shrugged and went on. "Like I was saying today's theme is-"

The snoring interrupted him once again. "One second please…" He said, walking towards a fiery red-headed man sleeping on a fold out cot. Legato shook the man, trying to wake him up.

"But mommy…I hate cello lessons…" the boy mumbled.

"Staccato?"

"Mommy, don't let the cello squish me again…"

"Staccato!" Legato yelled, shaking him again.

"Can I have a new liver mommy…mine got squished again…"

"Staccato!"

The young man rolled over, falling off the cot on the floor. He sat up quickly, looking around with droopy eyes. "What? Huh? Oh…Hi Legato." He waved, grinning innocently.

"Ladies and gentlemen, meet my little brother Staccato."

The audience clapped and applauded, laughing as the director of the show ran out of the curtain, tripping over the scene break. She stood up suddenly, fixing her glasses.

"STACCATO!" She screamed, running towards the younger Bluesummers with open arms.

"KORI!" He yelled back, his arms open as well.

The two ran towards each other, dramatic romance music beginning to play.

Then they hugged. Ah yes they hugged like no tomorrow. Like it was going out of style. They hugged happily, embracing each other deeply and intimately. For they-

"Excuse me." Legato said, rudely interrupting my beautiful description of the wonderful hug, which, by the way might later lead to some-

"Excuse me!" He said again. What! "I would _love_ to get on with the show. IF you don't mind."

Whiney ass little…fine. The two stopped hugging and Kori reluctantly left to return backstage.

"Now. As I was saying, today's theme is beauty.

"Beauty is found in the eye of the beholder, which means it is found in many forms. For some it can be represented by a dozen white roses, for others it could be represented by a dozen pale white bodies lying in a pile surrounded by gallons of blood.

"Well this show is about, normally my views on it. So I am going to read you a poem that shows both views. This poem was written by my _wonderful_ director. It is a free verse poem which has been left unnamed.

The shine of the knife  
Against my heart  
Ripping it out  
His love is painful.

A trickle of blood  
Down from my eyes  
Clear and burning  
Its way down my cheeks.

I remove the blade  
And stitch the wound

Healing myself form his hands.  
Ready to search again  
For hands not so rough.

And hands to heal my wound  
So calloused and worn  
A newer love  
One truer."

The audience clapped politely. Staccato sighed with love struck eyes. "I love her poetry."

"I hate you." Legato told his brother.

The back door of the hall busted open, a girl with long black hair stomped in angrily.

Staccato crouched in fear. "Oh no…"

"Ah…my _dear_ sister. Ladies and gentlemen, my sister Melody." Legato smirked, knowing Staccato was about to be in trouble for something. "What has he done?"

"Well he _was_ grounded for a week for letting the oranges rot so that he could use them in his stink-bomb experiment. But now it might be years before he has a possibility of going outside. He started his super glue rampage with Harmony's tea cup. That was after he poured hot sauce in it. Then he put super glue in Adante's underwear, which, because Adante is so stupid he actually didn't notice until he pulled them off to use the bathroom." The male audience cringed and groaned in pain. "So yeah…he's in trouble."

"So he didn't get to you."

"No. Fortunately." She glared at her immature brother. "For 17 you act like 9 year old. Do you know that?"

Staccato glared back. "For a 19 year old you act like a bitch." He smirked. "How's that for a 9-year-old's vocabulary?"

"Please…take him home Melody."

"Right. Come on now Staccato. Mom and Dad need to talk to you." Melody made a force field around her younger brother and carried him off. (A/N: Just so you know, I made up a whole Bluesummers family before The Incredibles even came out. So yeah, that is why she may remind you of the character Violet.)

But Staccato had gotten to Harmony. He had gotten the super glue, and glued the words "Melody's fat ass" in gold sparkly letters on her pants.

"Well I hate to say it. But that's all for today! See you next time."

"This episode of Poetry Corner with Legato Bluesummers," the narrator spoke. "Was brought to you by…

"B.D.N Super glue! It glows in the dark!

"Black Kitty Beer! Remember, whenever you feel like getting intoxicated, the black cat is always there!

"Bernardelli Insurance Society! We don't cover your attempts at catching Vash the Stampede.

"And…

"Kori's love for Staccato! Which brought him into the story. Oh and her message to the fans GO BONDAGE!"


	4. Legato's Poem

"Today," Legato started, curling his fingers and laying his head on his hands. "And you will listen to it with me won't you?"

"YEAH!"

"Good..." Legato stood up, searching his pockets. "Where did that damn..."

He leaned his large chair over, searching underneath it, then doing the same with with the couch...and the bookshelf...and the fake fireplace...and Kori. "Shit...where did I put that damn piece of-"

"Legato!" Someone yelled in shock. "Watch your language around your mother!"

Legato paled even more so than he already was. "Uh...m-m-mother! H-how nice i-it is to s-see you..." He said, forcing a smile towards the blue-haired woman. "W-what brings you here...to my show...in front of everyone...?"

Mrs. Bluesummers reached over and grabbed Legato's cheek, making the "smoochy" face. "Well I just had to come see my baby teaching these other kiddies about poetry. Oh you don't know how happy I am to see that you have become a mass murderer AND a T.V. star." The woman wiped her eyes from tears.

"Mother!" Legato said, embarassed.

"Now...what poem are you going to read for me today?"

"Well...I can't find it..."

"Well do you mind if I read one and you can read your next week then?"

Legato thought for a moment...then sighed. "Sure."

The Mother clapped her hands in delight, sitting down with a microphone in Legato's comfy chair. "This was a poem that my little shmiggy read to me when he was six...he couldn't even pronounce some of the words."

"Mother! No!" Legato screamed, running towards teh piece of paper, only to be held back by security guards. "What!"

"Orders from Kori."

Legato glared at the laughing director. "Damn you..."

"LANGUAGE!" Mrs. Bluesummers sighed. "Anyways, it goes like this..." Legato groaned in the background.

"Thanks Mom for bringing my soul to life.  
Thanks Mom for the warm and loving home  
that you and Dad provided.  
Thanks Mom for the baby dolls, high chairs,  
and cradles that it took you sometimes all night  
on Christmas Eve to put together.  
Thanks Mom for listening to my kind  
of Rock and Roll music,  
even though it wasn't Elvis Presley or Buddy Holly.  
Thanks Mom for the all night talk before college,  
when I refused to go because I got cold feet.  
Thanks Mom for always being here,  
even now when I am old enough to be  
a mother myself.

"Thanks Mom for feeding my hunger for knowledge;  
even after you worked all day you still had time to  
help me with my homework.  
Thanks Mom for teaching me manners;  
they come in quite handy now.  
Thanks Mom for making me learn to cook;  
I never thought I would enjoy it so much.  
Thanks Mom for putting me behind the wheel of a car,  
even when I was afraid of failure;  
who knew I would end up driving all  
over the country.  
Thanks Mom for supporting my decisions,  
even when you didn't agree.

"Thanks Mom for my compassionate heart;  
I like to think that I inherited it from you.  
Thanks Mom for showing me how it feels so much  
better to give than to receive.  
Thanks Mom for giving me high morals and values;  
they have always been my guide through life.  
Thanks Mom for allowing my independent  
spirit to soar,  
even when I seem a little crazy at times.  
Thanks Mom for my positive outlook on life;  
for me the glass is always half full.  
Thanks Mom for the unconditional love  
that you always provide.  
Thanks Mom for letting me be me.  
And especially,  
Thanks Mom for being you. "

"Now will you let go of me?" Legato said, crying. Kori nodded.

"Thank you for completely humiliating me Mother...now will you go home?"

"Your welcome Leggy-poo...but no. I have to stay and make sure you don't use that dirty mouth of yours anymore, now don't I?"

"Ugh..."

"Ah...don't make that face!"

"What face?"

"That one! The one you used to use when you were sick with the runs..."

"MOTHER!"

"Don't you raise your voice at me young man! You may be an adult but you are still my son and don't think I won't get the paddle out!"

"STOP EMBARRASSING ME!"

Momma Blueummers stopped, pale. "I...embarass you...?"

"Mother..." Legato said, rolling his eyes.

"Well...I'll just go then...If all I do is cause you utter humiliation..."

"Ugh...I'm sorry Mother..."

"No you're not..."

"Yes I am."

"No you're not..."

"Do you want me not to be?"

She sighed. "Well...can I stay."

Legato winced. "Yes...you can stay." Legato then smiled. "Besides... show is over anyways. Good bye boys and girls!"

"This episode of Poetry Corner: With Legato Bluesummers is brought to you by...

"Black kitty beer! When ever you want to get intoxicated the black cat is always there!

"Prom promise! Don't drink on prom night.

"Bernardelli Insurance Society! We don't pay the damages when you try to catch Vash the Stampede.

"Momma Bluesummers! She loves her...uh...Shmooky?"

"MOTHER!"

**_Note: This poem was written by Cindy Nelson. I don't claim it._**


	5. Choices

_**Note: I apologize ahead of time if you don't like the way I made your characters. And I don't have all characters requested in this chapter. But there will be other chapters and I am trying to fit them into the story. **_

"Good day boys and girls." Legato Bluesummers stated, curling his fingers together, his left leg sitting over his right as he sat in his Victorian style chair. "My my, it is a good day isn't it? Look at all the fans I have today."

"Legato you son of a bitch!"

Legato's eyes widened from the scream in the audience. "What?"

A dark woman with black hair stood up, her heavy black boots stomping against the floor. Her deep brown eyes flared with anger. "How dare you! You promised me a spot with the gung-ho guns!"

Legato looked closely at the all leather figure, the stood up in surprise. "Ah…uh…Angel!" He grinned nervously. "How nice it is to see you, but I am in the middle of a show."

"I don't give a shit!" Angel flailed her arms in the air, screaming as she stomped down the audience steps to the stage. "You promised me that I could be Angel of the Black Heavens! You swore to it!"

"I'm sorry, it wasn't my decision, it was all Midvalley!"

The saxophonist looked up from his mouthful of popcorn confusedly. "Wha?" He said, the buttery snack falling out of his mouth.

"Shut up Legato! You know you could have killed him or threatened to in order to get me in the gung-ho-guns!" Angel dictated every word with a jab of her finger in Legato's personal space. "And not to mention as your girlfriend, why didn't I know about this show."

Legato sighed, rubbing his temples. "You didn't know for _obvious_ reasons." He grabbed the young woman by the shoulders, forcing her to pay attention to him. "Listen. I am in the middle of a show, so if you will please return to your seat I will talk to you about this la-"

"I don't want to talk later! If I walk away from you now I'm not coming back."

"Good, you have been 'un-breaking up' with yourself for weeks now so…" Legato looked up at her smiling. "Bye now!"

Angel looked at him with tears in her eyes. "You're so mean…I'm going back to the Rodericks!"

Legato watched as she ran away from him, crying. "Now. In case you didn't know, today's episode is themed as choices." He fell back into his chair, sighing as he picked up his clipboard and skinny reading glasses. "And today's poem is…The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost."

"Hell yeah!"

Legato rolled his head back sighing. "Oh God, please don't be another raving fangirl."

The figure stood up from the audience. "I'm a fan_boy_! FanBOY!"

"Well this is a first."

The teenager ran down from the audience, forcefully shaking Legato's hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Bluesummers. You are just so freakin' cool."

"I wish," Legato said, pulling out a sanitation wipe and cleaning off his hands with a disgusted look on his face, "I could say the same for you."

"If it's not too much to ask sir…uh…may I have your autograph?" The boy said, pulling out a small notepad.

Legato sighed, taking the notepad from the person in front of him. "And your name?"

"Just call me Fudo."

Legato finished up the autograph and handed it back to him. Fudo walked three steps away and then read aloud in confusion. "Fudo, stay the hell away from me? Legato 'I hate you and you will die' Bluesummers?" Fudo then looked back at the blue haired man and grinned. "Thank you sir!" He waved, before returning to his seat in the audience.

"Anyways. This is the poem part of our story. Where we have NO interruptions. Right?"

The laughing audience instantly hushed and chanted in a monotoned voice. "Yes Mr. Legato."

"Good." Legato pushed his reading glasses back onto the bridge of his nose, sighing deeply before reading.

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood

I'm sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for the passing there

Had worn them really about the same

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black

Oh I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way

I doubted if I should ever come back

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-

I took the one last traveled by

And that has made all the difference."

Legato grinned, setting down the clipboard. "You see, most people who read this poem, think that the author had a nice little adventure in a newer type of atmosphere that most don't encounter, but in fact, he ended up in a no man's land in the middle of the dessert and found out why people never traveled that road. It was filled with all sorts of traps and animals that were out for new prey to devour and-" Legato's analysis was cut off as a baby screeched next to his mother.

The creepy man sighed. "Sorry about that…I apologize." He cleared his throat before asking the audience. "Did you like the poem?"

Once again the audience replied in a monotoned chant. "Yes Mr. Legato."

"Good." He stood up, dusting his pants off before bowing. "It has been a pleasure today. The few disturbances weren't as bad as normal." A thought of Rain crossed his mind as he shuddered in disgust. "I don't even want to know how she learned to do that." He shuddered again as he thought of something else. "Or why he'd want her to do that…"

"Well good bye boys and girls!"

"Today's episode of Poetry Corner: with Legato Bluesummers was brought to you by…

"Doc's dating service! We learn from mistakes like you saw here today!

"Bernardelli insurance society: We don't pay for damage due to you trying to catch Vash the Stampede.

"Black kitty beer: Whenever you want to get intoxicated the black cat is always there. Please don't drink and ride a thomas.

"The Roderick Thieves, who are now hunting down Legato for breaking their cousin's heart."

"Dammit not again!" Legato said, jumping out of the back window.

_**Note: I apologize again if you don't like the way I displayed your character. I will change them if you are the least bit offended by them because I would hate if I am disliked because of my point of view.**_


	6. GHG Part I

**_Note: I based all poems I wrote for the characters on both Manga and Anime facts. You don't have to read both to get what the person is talking about, but if you do happen to get confused, e-mail me and I will explain what I read. Keep in mind that I only know about the Manga through other people so if some things are wrong, please tell me in an e-mail or review. And as for disclaiming, I don't own the characters, but I wrote each and every one of the poems myself. And they aren't funny like you'd think from the characters…sorry. Thank you…_**

The screams of the audience never ceased as the lights dimmed on the crowd and shined brightly onto the cozy looking stage. A blue haired man slowly walked out onto the stage looking a superb as ever. "Good day boys and girls! Today is a very special day. Do you know why?" Legato asked, smiling eerily.

"Why!" The audience screamed.

"Because today, my dear friends the Gung-Ho Guns are coming in to read their poems they wrote after extensive poetry training." The crowd cheered wildly, some of them calling out names of their favorite member of the crew. "Now some of them wrote their poetry by themselves, but others needed help from the trainer in poetry camp. I hope you give them the same respect you give me. They worked very hard."

Legato then sat down in his chair smiling mischievously. "Now the poems are going to take a few episodes to put together with the time we have. But today's guests are Rai Dei the Blade, with a Haiku, Grey the Nine Lives, which I will have to read for him, but his poem is called, Shattered Butterfly, Midvalley the Hornfreak with, My Serenade, and Monev the Gale with Preparing in the Darkness." The audience once again cheered, this time screaming for one of the four guests that were to appear. "And our first guest is Rai Dei!"

From the "front door" a samurai appeared with a small slip of paper. He waved at the large crowd, now sweating intensely. "Hi…uh…Legato." He said, pulling at the collar of his kimono and clearing his throat.

"Hello Rai Dei. Ladies and gentlemen, in case you didn't know, a Haiku, which is what Rai Dei will be reading, is a poem that doesn't have to rhyme, but has to have three lines, the first and third line both include five syllables and the second line has seven."

Rai Dei nodded, wiping the sweat off of his forehead with the back of his arm.

"Okay Rai Dei, read your poem."

Rai dei coughed, "Uh right…" He took a deep breath before unfolding the small slip of paper and reading aloud.

"Lay in the abyss

Of a complete awareness

Inside of my soul"

Legato clapped formally, smiling as Rai Dei sat back down. "That was wonderful." He then looked at Rai Dei, crossing one leg over the other as he leaned on the left arm of the chair. "So tell me, did it take you long to write this?"

Rai Dei smiled nervously. "Oh hours. You can't write such perfection in a short amount of time. And I admit, I had a little help."

Some of the audience giggled lightly but Rai Dei ignored it. "Well," Legato began, clapping his hands together. "Due to the short amount of time we are given, I must bid you adieu, and now for our next guest, Grey!"

A tall form busted through the scene, revealing the cameras and workers backstage. Legato rubbed his temples in frustration but sighed, welcoming the large man. "Hello Grey the Nine Lives."

The gigantic robot man raised his hand as a greeting, handing Legato a piece of paper.

"Is this your poem?"

Grey shook his head lightly.

"Well let me just read this then."

"I try to hold a butterfly

But it falls to pieces in my hands

Shatters like glass

Cutting my flesh until I bleed

My blood drips onto the floor

Mingling with my tears of pain

As I clench my aching heart

For nothing beautiful can be sifted

Through my rough hands."

Legato rubbed the "tears" in his eyes away, looking up at the bulky cyborg. "That was beautiful. Did you write that yourself?"

Grey shook his head again.

"Well done." Legato clapped loudly. "Bravo, bravo!" He sighed, sitting back down. "Well unfortunately I must say goodbye to you as well, welcoming our next guest, a dear friend of mine, Midvalley the Hornfreak!"

Midvally, instead of using the door, walked through the hole created by Grey, still with his trusty alto saxophone. "Oh Legato, you forgot someone."

Legato sighed in annoyance. "And his trusty saxophone Sylvia."

Midvalley smiled. "Well I might as well get on with reading then."

"Listen to my song

My serenade

My story

No words are spoken

Only sounds

Of sadness

Of joy

All of my emotions

My tears

My laughter

Are expressed through

My song

My story

My serenade"

Legato clapped once again. "Very impressive Midvalley. Did you do that yourself?"

"Yeah. It took me a little while, but I'm happy with it. It didn't rhyme but it doesn't have to it's one of them uh…free poems."

"Free verse." Legato corrected. "Well it looks like we have time for another guest. Maybe we should…Everyone please welcome Monev the Gale."

There was a knock on the door before it opened, revealing the large muscular man, who couldn't fit through the door. So after Midvalley exited the hole in the wall, he entered through it as well. "Hi!" He said roughly, waving at the crowd.

"Hello Monev. It's been a while. But I understand you are reading your poem entitled Preparing in the Darkness. Correct?"

Monev smirked. "Yup. Let's get started." He took out his paper but stopped before reading. "This is about my twenty years in that old cellar…

"Alone in my dark corridor

My flesh begins to sweat

Muscles clench

The darkness envelopes

All hours of day

My soul is black

Like the cellar walls

Yes, the wall that bind me

From the light

From freedom

And this is all I can do

Ready myself

For reality"

Legato clapped again. "Why Monev, I didn't know you had such a sensitive side."

"Neither did I." He said, wiping the tears from his eyes.

"Well coincidentally I guess we can read one more poem. Hmm…who to call on…aha! Caine the Longshot with his poem, Our Similarity."

The dark man walked through the door, not doing anything energetic, only handing the a paper to Legato before sitting down.

"So I guess I will read it then."

"I can see you from a distance

I can kill you from an out post

You'll never know what hit you

Until you fall to your knees

Soaking in your crimson fluid

The disgusting red liquid

That flows through us all

It makes us all the same

For people make us different

For it is the nature of

The disgusting species

Known as human."

"Wow, symbolic. I really like this one. I think that everyone can learn a little from this poem if they were to read it." Legato said. "Thank you for that wonderful piece of literature Caine."

Caine nodded, standing up from the love seat and walking out the door.

"Well there is no time for questions from him. Well time is up anyways. Goodbye boys and girls! On the next episode we will hear from Leonof the Puppet Master with She's Always With Me, Zazie the Beast with Higher Being, E.G. Mine with From Within, and Chapel of the Evergreen with Regret." Legato waved, smiling as the lights cut out.

"This episode of Poetry Corner was brought to you by…

"Bernardelli Insurance Society- We don't pay for damages caused by your attempts to capture Vash.

"Black Kitty Beer- Remember, whenever you want to get intoxicated, the black kitty is always there.

"DUI School for Gunsmoke Teens- Don't drink and drive

"Millions Knives Poetry Camp- Open your heart to literature.

"And…

"Foohy Gooey Pencil Grippers- They help when you have to write 11 poems."

**_Note: See, I told you the poems weren't funny. I actually tried in case you couldn't tell with Grey's poem…but it didn't work I hope you liked the poems I worked hard on them. And my secret to literal writing all my stories out is in the ads. Well c-ya love ya bye!_**

_**DPA(Pyro)**_


	7. GHG Part II

The theme song played, the red curtains opened, and a blue-haired man sat down in an easy-chair. The spotlight shined on the man as he brought his hands to his crossed legs and stated calmly over the roaring audience. "Good morning boys and girl. And welcome to the greatest poetry show ever. Poetry Corner: With (me) Legato Bluesummers."

The audience became even louder as he stood and bowed the audience. "Now, in case your fragile minds have forgotten, todays guests are Leonof The Puppet Master, Zazie the Beast, E.G. Mine, and Chapel of the Evergreen."

The audience cheered again. "Now, for our first guest, Le- wait…I think we will save the best for last. Lets bring out Zazie the Beast. With his poem, Higher Being."

Everyone looked around for the blonde-haired little boy, but instead saw the boy known as Fudo stand up in the audience. "Here I am, Legato." Said a familiar voice inside the boy.

"Ah, Zazie, a new victim I see?"

"Well of course." The boy laughed. "Well, after that damn priest shot the old one."

Legato laughed, "Yeah…" Legato stood and greeted the boy with a handshake. "Well, what type of poem do you have to share with us?"

Zazie smiled, taking a seat next to Legato on the couch. "The easiest kind. Free verse."

Legato waved at him to start his poem, allowing Zazie to start reading.

"I look like them  
But I am not  
I am better  
More mature  
More grown up  
Smarter  
Stronger  
I am a beast  
I am a demon  
And I shall never die"

Legato and the rest of the audience clapped and whistled at the wonderful poem. "That was very…odd.." Legato stated, before pulling the boy up from the couch and pushing him towards the "door". "Bye now!"

Legato turned back to the audience, "Okay, now for our next guest, with hopefully a better, and less contradictory poem."

Sitting back down, he sighed as he realized who the next guest was. "Everyone welcome, E.G. Mine." He said blankly.

The scrawny man walked out to the stage, everyone awing at the sight of him without his famous suit of needles. "Yeah yeah…"

He walked over to Legato, not allowing the blue-haired man to talk as he said. "Don't worry Legato, I'm just going to say my poem and leave."

"No one trusts me  
All betray me  
Laugh at me  
Call me names  
Spit your insults  
I'm still confident  
I will succeed  
With or without you  
I will carry on  
On my own  
With only confidence  
And trust from within  
Myself."

With that E.G. walked back towards the door. Suddenly stopped by the surprising applaud from the audience, he turned, smiling. He took a quick bow in his moment of fame before walking back out the door.

Even Legato clapped, then calmed himself as he was ready to introduce the next guest. "Next up is my dear friend Chapel of the Evergreen."

The audience cheered once more as the dark clothed bald man walked through the stage door and sat down quietly, laying his cross next to him.

"Welcome, Chapel." Legato greeted, nodding to the man next to him.

"Hello Legato." He said blandly, pulling out a folded up piece of paper from his jacket. "I came here with my poem 'Regret'."

"Good." The blue-haired man commented, gesturing him to stand. "Well lets hear it."

Chapel cleared his throat, slowly unfolding the paper and standing center stage.

"Looking down upon us from the heavens  
My only son  
I taught him greatly since he was seven  
And killed him

And I'd do anything to take them back  
Those bullets  
And treat him with the love I lack  
From my heart"

Legato was brought to tears from the emotion in which Chapel spoke, handing a tissue to himself and his guest who was also crying. "Chapel, that was simply beautiful."

Chapel smiled teary-eyed. "I guess it was my way of apologizing to Nicholas."

Legato nodded. "And what a fine way to do so."

Chapel walked out of the room without another word as Legato told him goodbye.

"Now, for our last poem of the evening. Everyone welcome Leonof the Puppet Master."

Leonof, slowly but surely, made it to the stage, dragging the well known coffin behind him. "Hello, Master Legato. It is a pleasure to be here on your children's show."

Legato greeted him warmly, shaking his hand and helping the old man sit down. "Yes, and you have a wonderful poem to read to us, do you not?"

"Well it's just another one of my rambling pieces. Honestly I'd have to say I have written better."

"Well would you like to read it to us?"

"Not really, but I will anyways." The old man smiled, standing up and reciting a memorized poem.

"In the coffin that drags behind  
Lies the maiden so fare and fine  
The woman who once stole my heart  
Whose beauty was a work of art  
She left me all alone with tears in her eyes  
I held her close as we said our goodbyes  
But I couldn't let my darling love  
Fly without me up above  
So instead of leaving her in the ground  
Wherever I go I drag her around  
In the coffin wherever I am  
Leaving a trail of rising sand"

The audience was speechless at the great poem. "That was amazing." Legato said, sitting the man back down. "Just for that I think you deserve a place on our wall of honors."

As the last three words were spoken corny music played in the background as another curtain opened to reveal a blank wall. "OH GRAFFITI MAN!" Legato yelled in an out of character voice.

A man in a spray paint costume ran out to the stage, past Legato to the blank brick wall. Within seconds the poem and author was on the wall in graffiti style writing. The man then ran once again backstage.

Legato smiled as Leonof stood up. "Well I must go, I'm afraid I have some other jobs in which I must attend to." He bowed to Legato, he and his coffin walking/dragging off stage.

"Well that's it for our show." Legato smiled. "I hope you come back to the next one where we have the cast of the original show Trigun share their poems."

"This episode of Poetry Corner: With Legato Bluesummers was brought to you by…

"Black kitty beer- Remember, next time you want to escape reality, let the black cat lead the way.

"Millions Knives Poetry Boot Camp- turning spider poems into butterfly art

"Meryl Stryfe's Zen Garden- a relaxing place to work.

"And, DPA's lack of Poetry Corner- which causes many delays in updates!"


End file.
